Category Archives: Relationship Information

How to Reestablish Trust in the Relationship

how to reestablish trust in the relationshipTrust can be the strongest element in a relationship. It is a barrier against the challenges presented by the outside world seeking to destroy a couple.

What happens when trust is damaged? Can it be shored up or even reconstructed? The short answer is yes. Do you know how to reestablish trust in the relationship?

The answer centers around the difficult process requiring honesty, open communication and diligence in forging a trusting bond. One needs to walk the hard path to get back to where they belong.

Speaking the Truth

Trust lives in an environment of honesty. Regardless of how good or bad a relationship ended, each person needs to be truthful about everything.

Honesty should not be used as a club to bend the other person to the will of the other. The past, present and future depends on being careful and using important keys to build trust.

  • Accurately Address Things: Couching things or overly editing clouds the message.
  • Watch How the Message Is Delivered: Tone conveys a great deal when speaking. Being too soft or stern may blunt or heighten what is being said unnecessarily.
  • Always Be Kind: Remember the goal is to rebuild trust. A firm message offered with polite words allows for ongoing communication.

Allow a Response

Initially, it can be easy to get too focused on one’s role in the exchange. This is a two way street. One of the hardest things anyone may face targets the reply from the other person.

  • Be Quiet: Hopefully, they listened thoughtfully to what was said. They deserve the same respect. Hearing back may require swallowing bitter aspects of one’s own personality or behavior.
  • Don’t Defend: Everyone, especially when receiving personal information, tends to want to leap into defense mode. Trust often needs space and acceptance. If offered with similar kindness, one must avoid the urge to choke off the exchange.
  • Mirror the Behavior: During the conversation, make an effort to feel how things are going and respond accordingly. A strong sense of control, which may mask hidden defensiveness, might urge one to rush things along or pull back. One can be thoughtful without hiding behind a mask.

Make Contact

Emotional contact with one’s partner fosters an environment of trust. Treading carefully at the beginning presents a greater level of comfort.

Small things like eye contact and non verbal cues will help one’s partner witness the importance and investment to growing trust. As with all things when building trust, moving too fast will likely shatter progress, so avoid being overly physical.

Consistency Proves Key

Trust cannot be built in a single conversation or afternoon. Returning to a place where the relationship returns to a healthy place requires slow, steady growth.

This means making time for one another, not pushing too deep or lashing out when things get hard. The level of difficulty can feel overwhelming. One needs to acknowledge and accept what these emotions are without letting them damage the conversation.

As fragile as a snowflake, one must treat trust with the respect it deserves. A relationship never survives without it, so it is up to both parties to maintain trust for the life of the relationship.

Trust thrives with open communication, mutual respect and consistent contact. Pour in those and watch the trust flourish.

how to reestablish trust in the relationship


How to Know if Your Boyfriend Still Loves You

How to know if Your Boyfriend Still Loves YouIf you feel your relationship is on the rocks and you are wondering, how to know if your boyfriend still loves you, them you might be trying to answer the million dollar question. When things are not going well in any relationship it is very easy to let all of our insecurities boil up to the surface and doubt your relationship.

One way to find the answer is to ask him straight out. Try to prepare for the possibility that he does not. If he answers you that he no longer loves you then ask him to explain himself. Some relationships just do not last and your’s could be one of them.

However, asking him might not get the answer you are seeking. In fact, men are often reluctant to tell a woman they love them. Instead pay attention to how he treats you. Men often show their emotions by what they do for their woman. Does he wash your car without you having to ask? Does he pick up a coffee for you when he goes for one for himself? Does he remember what you favorite food is or favorite flower? It is the little things that make a difference in a relationship.

Figure out what made you start feeling he didn’t love you. Is he spending more time away from you? Why? Is he working a lot or does he have family obligations that take up much of his time? I guess it doesn’t matter what the reasons are, the result is you feel lonesome and unloved.

It is obvious that if he still loves you, your relationship needs some serious time and attention to to have your feeling his love. The best way to begin is to learn to communicate better. Talk to him and see if he feels the same way. If he does then ask him if he is willing to do whatever it takes to make the relationship better.

Do not, under any circumstances make demands on him and do not let him make any demands on you. If you work together as a team your relationship will have a much better chance of survival. If he agrees that the relationship needs work then you can both go talk to someone who is experienced in the art of making a relationship stronger.

Your Boyfriend Still Loves YouThat may be your pastor, or a trusted teacher, or someone who has been through the same things you are going through now, or a professional counselor. Who you decide to talk to is up to you and your budget. You can even get advice online. Some of it is even free.

Before you decide to talk to anyone though, it would be a good idea to sit down together and figure out what the problems are. The best way to do this is to sit down when all is quiet and both take a sheet of paper and pen and make your own lists. When you are done go over them both together and see if things match up or if there are differing opinions as to what is not working.

Try to work things out together. If you can, great! If you can’t then it would be the time to speak to someone outside of the relationship and get some advice. After all of this work, if you are still wondering, if he still loves you then maybe the answer lies in your own insecurities and it is time to work on your self-esteem.

Tony Robbins Saves A Marriage in 8 Minutes Video:


What are the Things You Should Discuss Prior to Marriage?

It’s disheartening to look at the sad statistics these days when it comes to the divorce rate compared with the number of actual successful marriages. So many men and women jump into marriage only to lament later in those same marriages that there are so many things they wished they had known before they said I do.

Things You Should Discuss Prior to MarriageThis is true even of the people who married after living with their partner for a significant amount of time. It seems that even knowing your partner as much as you can from living with them still isn’t enough.

Here are some of the things people wish they had known before walking down the aisle:

What being married is really like: This is especially true of women who buy into the hype perpetuated by the media that marriage is a fairy tale with a happy ending. This can even happen to intelligent and highly intelligent women. Too late, they realize that they’ve entered into something far more serious than a fairy tale.

Being more acquainted with themselves: Too many people get married before they really understand who they are. That’s not helpful when they suddenly have to take on the added task of understanding another person that’s a big part of their lives.

Taking a little more time before getting married: This may be true for mostly women, although men too have felt pressured into getting married before they were completely ready. They may find after the fact that they are not even in love with the person they married.

Know their future in laws a bit better: Some people are blindsided by how much their husbands and wives are influenced by his own parents’ view of marriage and what it should be like. That’s not always a good situation for a marriage.

Bad behavior can only get worse: This is common among the women that always made excuses for the bad behavior of their future husbands prior to marrying them. Surprisingly, they couldn’t believe that they were unable to change this behavior once they got married.

Need to know more about money: Many people are astounded that they are not so capable at handling money when it’s forced on them. Women in particularly often realize that have made themselves dependent by not taking an active part in handling the finances jointly. Women should always know what’s going on with finances in their marriage.

What it takes to make a marriage succeed: There’s no real answer to this one. In fact, what works for one family may not work for another one. This is something that all couples must puzzle out for themselves. It’s more a matter of trial and error. If one thing doesn’t work, then something else can be tried. The most important aspect here is being able to talk about it.

Granted, knowing the answers to all of the above won’t guarantee a successful and happy marriage. However, it’s very possible that being more familiar with them will give you an edge that others don’t have.

The biggest rule when it comes to having a good marriage is to never ignore any doubts that you may have. If you don’t feel one hundred percent that you’re ready to get married, then don’t, and don’t let anyone else talk you into it before you’re ready.



How to Give a Relationship What it Needs

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Every person requires specific things within their relationships to help them to flourish. Sometimes individuals find knowing or articulating these needs more difficult than imagined.

For someone on the outside, it becomes easier to see the areas requiring the most attention. This clears the way for them to respond accordingly. Men present specific areas where their partner proves able to motivate them into a higher level.

Physical Intimacy

Men respond in a particular way to physicality. The impression of men always craving sex turns out to be rooted in their response to physical closeness.

While proximity does not always lead to sex, it grows harder as couples become closer to extricate one from the other. Caution should be used, especially early on, when walking into this territory because of the confusion generated by too closely tying sex to every single form of contact.

What To Do: Start with small touches in areas that are sweet without being overly intimate. The neck, upper arms and back are good areas to begin with. Also, letting him touch you in return creates a bond beyond the hours of conversation you have.

Room to Grow

Men need to feel the sensation of being able to roam. In most situations, the sensation is enough.

They are not looking to stray or even leave the security of the relationship. The idea of being able to move about pursing things at their own pace allows a natural sense of wanderlust to be slacked.

What To Do: Urge him to take nights or weekends with his friends. Through this small act, he will return excited to be back in your presence once more. It is also best to let him share what he wants to rather than pursing a bunch of details.

===>>Find More About Ways to Have a Great Relationship

Emotional Closeness

Similar to the physicality, men crave the knowledge their partner longs to be close with them emotionally. They may not express such things at the beginning because of the risk involved.

Men need to feel they are in a safe place with someone who has supported them. In this space, they become able to disclose the depth of what they are feeling.

What To Do: Start slow and model emotional sharing. Men, though sometimes emotionally unaware, know surrendering the things they feel to their partner feels good. They often have not been encouraged in this area, so you have to take on that role.

Encouragement and Respect

Everyone requires a pat on the back from time to time. Men often fail to absorb these expressions of care either because they do not believe they need it or they have received too little of it to activate them properly.

Too often it is assumed men subsist fine without these things. A lack of familiarity should never be confused with life being satisfactory without their partner’s encouragement and respect.

What To Do: Repeat yourself until your partner genuinely accepts what is being said. A careful examination of expressions and responses might be necessary to verify he does not push them aside without taking them into his heart.

Several of these things sound simple and they often begin in such a way. Taking the time, giving freely and being grateful as the relationship deepens demonstrates how important these areas are.

We all impact one another. A garden may begin small and then flourish into a rich and varied verdant valley. Go slow, see the growth and revel in the ways you and your partner grow closer. You will be glad you did.


How To Regain Your Husband’s Attention

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Do you feel neglected by your husband? Many married women today are experiencing this problem of feeling unwanted by their hubbies.

The big question is what really happens after getting married? Before he married you, he was caring, romantic and treated you like a queen.

Remember those nights he used to bring you beautiful flowers with no apparent reason? Now you feel that he doesn’t want to hear anything from you or even cares about your feelings.

There is definitely one concern in your life; is there any way to change this behavior or will you just spend the rest of your life with a man who doesn’t recognize your value?

The answer is no. The power to save your marriage by making your man more romantic and attentive lies entirely in your hands. The following points will help you do it successfully.

Make your feelings known to him

The moment you feel ignored, don’t keep it to yourself, talk to your husband and explain to him about your feelings. The key to success for any marriage is open, honest communication.

==>>Learn How to Have a Better Relationship with Your Husband

However, you need to be careful with this matter. Approaching your husband and telling him that he’s ignoring you will likely put him on the defensive.

He will definitely find an excuse for his behavior and it can lead to an argument which is not healthy for your relationship.

The best way to approach this issue to politely open up to him the mistakes he is making and be clear that you no longer accept it any more.

Create Some Distance between the Two of You

One of the best strategies to try when you feel ignored is creating some distance between you and your husband. When a man gets married, he usually feels secure and confident in his wife’s devotion and love.

This is the main reason he stops being the caring man he was before, since he knows the wife will be there for him no matter what.

Once your husband becomes accustomed to having you want his attention all the time, he will try to shut you out.

One way to have him stop ignoring you is by paying less attention to him. If you concern yourself with other things outside your home, he’ll immediately notice it.

This will make him feel insecure since the grip he has on you will be loosening and he will, in all likelihood, act accordingly by giving you the kind of attention you deserve.

Show him that you have a life outside the walls of your home.

marriage counselling

Your husband may be taking you for granted because you devote most of your time to your family, including him.

He is likely to devalue you when you focus so much on the household activities instead of outside interests.

Try to be passionate about something new. This can be any kind of activity such as doing some volunteer work or taking a part time job.

This will make him understand that you are a vibrant lady with many different interests and he will value you even more.

Seek the help of a marriage counselor

If, after doing everything in your power, things still remain unchanged, it is important to seek help from a marriage specialist.

They will be able to advise you on the best actions to take because there may be a bigger problem which needs to be addressed.

After getting the solutions, you will have your husband’s love and attention back and you’ll live happily thereafter.

==>>Learn How to Have a Great Relationship with Your Husband


How To Save A Marriage – 5 Things You Can Do Today

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There is lots of advice on how to save a marriage available. However some of this information seems to be rather vague regarding learning communication skills, not criticizing, forgiving each other. This is good information, but there is a lot more your can do to improve the state of your marriage. While most of these steps take some time, they are all things you can start doing right now.

How To Save A Marriage – Have A Cooling Down Period!

how to save a marriageWhether your spouse has just told you they want a divorce or you’ve been talking about it for a while, a cooling down period will do you both some good.

Take about a week to get away from each other and gather your thoughts. This is no time to make a laundry list of your “future ex’s” faults, though!

Instead, focus on remembering why you fell in love with your spouse in the first place and think through some calm, respectful ways to address the problems when you see each other again.

How To Save A Marriage – Work On Your Own Issues!

Yes, you have issues, too. Sorry. And these aren’t just issues between you and your spouse, but issues related to any emotional baggage you brought into the marriage, too. If you’re taking a cooling off period, that’s a great time to work on these problems, although you shouldn’t expect to resolve any deep issues in such a short time.

Keep in mind, too, that you need to be careful about assigning blame. Especially if your spouse has been violent or verbally abusive. While many therapists who understand will remind you it “takes two to tango,” don’t start thinking you made your partner act a certain way.

How To Save A Marriage – Resolve Conflicts!

If you’ve already taken your cooling off period and given some serious thought to how you might be contributing to the conflict, set aside a few uninterrupted hours (read: get a babysitter) to talk things over. If it seems like you always end up in shouting matches every time you try to work things out, you might want to do this in a marriage counselor’s office. A neutral third party knowledgeable about how to save a marriage can really help keep things sane. This can help you make some real progress.

How To Save A Marriage – Spend Quality Time With Each Other!

how to save a marriageNot spending enough quality time together is often what starts marital problems in the first place. Then once the marriage is really on the rocks, you spend more and more time apart.

Fortunately, it’s an easy trend to reverse. Find something you both enjoy doing. As long as you can chat with each other while doing it. Also schedule a time for the activity at least twice a week.

Final Thoughts – Be Patient!

Most truly useful advice on how to save a marriage won’t give you quick fixes that you can get done in one day. However a lot will give you tactics you can at least try out right away. You may think you need a short break from your spouse to ease tensions. Or perhaps you just need to focus on each other a little more to keep things from really falling apart.

There is always something you can do today to get started in the right direction. The important thing is to take action now and not waste any more time hoping things will get better on their own.


Treat Her Like a Queen and Get King Benefits

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Have you ever noticed that even in marriages where the couples seem to have it all, looks, money, the perfect story, things sometimes fall apart? You would think it leaves a lot of mere mortals without the fairy tale budgets and picture perfect smile stand a chance. The truth is, that the regular people of the world stand as much of a chance as those with big budgets to buy their women a little bit of everything. Treat her like a queen and you will not need a fairy tale budget!

Why So You Want to Treat Her Like a Queen?

Treat her like a queenBecause when it comes down to it, most women are not the proverbial material girl no matter how great of a show they put on. They may claim that diamonds are a girl’s best friend. They certainly won’t turn them down when offered.

But, what a woman really wants is to feel like the queen of your world and not just an afterthought. These simple steps might not sound like much, but they will make a world of difference to the woman who is currently queen of your heart.

Don’t Sweat the Details

Many men follow the wrong advice when they listen to people telling them not to sweat the small stuff. Life is the small stuff. It’s the small stuff that passes by, ignored and overlooked, while you are busy looking for the big statement items.

Do not let her get away because you were so busy looking for something monumental to show your love that you overlooked a thousand small ways you could have told her or showed her how you feel. Flowers never go unappreciated.

Kiss her Hello and Goodbye – No Matter What

Life gets busy sometimes. It is easy to overlook the details of what is going on at home when you have a thousand different demands for your time. You maybe firing your way at the office or you are worried about how you are going to make ends meet next month. Whatever your worries may be, you should have no worry greater in your life than greeting your women. Saying hello and leaving her with something to remember you by throughout the day adds to your relationship.

The Perfect Solution?

So simple, but often overlooked.  It is a kiss. It costs little and speaks volumes.

Treat Her Like a Queen by Giving her a Night Off Each Week

Treat her like a queen2There is nothing the average busy wife and mother wants more than a night off each week.

Come home and take over. Plan the meals. Feed the kids. Bathe the kids. Tuck them in.

Draw her a bath and take over kitchen cleanup duties while she relaxes in the tub.

It will feel like a little piece of paradise to her and show her just how devoted to her you really are.

Send her Silly Little Love Notes

They may seem silly to you, but these are the things she will read a thousand times over the years. She will show them to girlfriends and talk about how wonderful her guy is to her.

She will wrap them in ribbons and take them out to look over whenever the road gets a little rough between you. If you continue sending them, she will often revisit them to see how things have changed, and how much they have stayed the same between the two of you.

You do not have to spend ridiculous sums of money to show her that she really is the queen of your heart. More importantly, these small gestures make her feel like she is the queen of your world too.


Overcome Communication Problems In Relationships

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Communication problems in relationships are so common. In fact no matter how great you and your sweetie get along, you are bound to run into some miscommunication somewhere along the line. The good news is, with the right approach, these problems usually aren’t too hard to solve.

Overcome Communication Problems by Bridging the Gender Divide

Communication ProblemsMen and women approach relationships in distinctly different ways. Without an open mind, it is all too easy to write the opposite gender off as “illogical” or even start thinking of their differences as childish or petty.

The fact is neither gender is perfectly logical. Taking some time to learn about exactly how the opposite gender looks at love matters can help you avoid a lot of problems in relationships.

Overcome Communication Problems by Listening Thoughtfully

Don’t forget that you are one half of the communication problem. When you have been together for a while, you might start to think you know what your partner is going to say. Unless you have ESP, though, you will get a lot farther by actually hearing your partner out. When your sweetie tells you something, restate what they said to make sure you understood correctly and let them know you heard.

Release the Need for Blame

When one of you has a problem, the relationship has a problem and it is in both your best interests to work it out peacefully.

Instead of going around in circles trying to decide whose fault it is, focus on how you are going to solve it. Likewise, try to avoid blaming your partner for your overall mood. Specific issues like “When you flirt with other people, I feel rejected” are fine. However sweeping statements like “You make me miserable” or “You stress me out” are taking it too far.

Stick to the Facts

When trying to talk over problems in relationships, do not bring up any thing you cannot prove. Instead, stay with what cannot be argued like your own feelings and what your partner already agrees they do. For example, saying “You disrespected me in front of my friends” can be argued because standards of respect differ. On the other hand, saying “I was embarrassed when you told Dave you don’t think I should ask for a raise” is not only unarguable. In fact it gets your point across more clearly.

Be Frank, but Kind

Communication ProblemsYou are not doing anyone any favors by taking a “put up and shut up” attitude to problems in relationships. All you end up doing is allowing wounds to fester. They may eventually reach the point where they will never heal at all.

Instead, speak your mind when you have a problem, but do so with gentleness, kindness, and respect. Remember, your partner probably is not trying to hurt or annoy you. In fact they may be pretty upset to hear you are unhappy.

Be a Friend, not a Coach

Chances are, your partner is not with you because they are hoping you can correct all their bad habits and personality flaws. You are not their parent, teacher, coach, or boss. As a matter of fact you are their friend and lover.

You may think you are giving constructive criticism. However your partner might think your love or respect for them has diminished because of this one little flaw they have. Instead of criticizing, encourage improvement by giving your partner some positive feedback when they do something you really like.

There, that does not sound too hard, does it? These techniques may be simple, but the really do work to solve communication problems in relationships. Give them a try.


Don’t Fall for Rebound Dating

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How many times have you seen one of your friends break up from a long-term partner only to find, the very next week, someone who was obviously all wrong for them? It is one of the most common after effects at the end of relationships and that is rebound dating.

The idea of rebound relationships is so ingrained into the way we think about dating that it just seems natural to look for one after a breakup. There is something to be said for getting “back in the saddle”. However, choosing a partner when your judgment is clouded usually does more harm than good. If you want to get over your ex fast, there are better ways to do it.

Band-Aid Relationships and the Rebound Dating Mindset

Take Time for YourselfThe first step to keeping yourself from doing something you will regret is to take an honest look at what you are feeling.

You should understand how those feelings can lead you places you would rather not go.

A lot of times we just miss the companionship and look for someone to fill the gap in our schedule.

To distract us from the fact that our heart has just been broken. In that case, make a point of finding a social time-filler that doesn’t involve romance.

Maintain Your Standards

The best thing you can do to avoid getting involved with someone who is all wrong for you is stick to your standards. In fact, go ahead and raise them a little just to add a safety buffer. If the person you are thinking about dating is less kind, less intelligent, less anything that you would normally want, stay away. These people do not make for good relationships, rebound dating or otherwise.

Beware of the Handiest Person

When we look for someone to rebound with, we need someone fast. We feel we don’t have time to “waste” looking for someone we will really could click with. In fact we tend to latch on to someone we already know and have at least some rapport with.

It might be a close friend, a co-worker, even someone who works at the grocery store down the street. If you find yourself falling for someone you have never been the least bit attracted to before, stop and think about what is really going on here.

Take Time for Yourself

Rebound DatingInstead of filling your time with go-nowhere dates, get out and make some new friends (that’s “friends,” not “lovers.”

There’s a difference.) Get involved in something you have always wanted to do but never had time for.

Whatever you do, do not sit around pining for your ex or scouring the bookstore shelves for self help books.

Be Gentle with Yourself

Even if you are not sobbing into your pillow every night, the end of a relationship will naturally make you feel a little bummed out and low on energy. Take that into account and try not to start any major projects for a few weeks. Instead, treat yourself to some time out to do something you enjoy.

Of course, not every rebound relationship ends up a disaster. If you are lucky, you will have a fun fling. If you do decide to get involved with someone after a breakup, though, make sure you have taken a little time off by yourself. You also don’t want to be lowering your standards. While we can’t prevent broken relationships: rebound dating gone wrong is easy to avoid.